So this week was kind of whirl wind for me. Acupuncture drama Tuesday. Hair drama Wednesday. Headache Thursday. But then good news on Thursday did me some good. Found out a friend was coming to town. Someone I had wanted to see for a while.
Back to bad news....I had to work all weekend. Errggg...! Good news is I still got to spend some time with my friend and have some much needed fun.
I actually have been a bit silly and bit crazy over it. Nothing out of the blue for me.
Looking forward to more good times soon.
Monday, June 13, 2011
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Two Days Of Trouble
So this past weekend was my anniversary....a very scary thing let me tell you. I went into thinking please don't let me give myself away by expressing my actual thoughts about the relationship out loud...(a little champagne can make me let my guard down). So that being said, I had certain reservations about doing anything too quite (like sitting around at home watching movies), or too social (like getting together with certain someone who makes me get all silly and giddy). It was just better to stay out and about and away from people 'he', or 'I', or 'we' know. Needless to say it worked out. I thought for sure it would be two days of trouble, but instead, I had a very nice weekend, bordering on 'the-way-things-used-to be' and I can honestly say that I wish I had a few more days like it.
Who wouldn't like early lunch, followed by new hot movie, and toped off with some Boston Legal or Jane Austen? Anyway....we'll see what happens next weekend.
All hell could break loose.
Who wouldn't like early lunch, followed by new hot movie, and toped off with some Boston Legal or Jane Austen? Anyway....we'll see what happens next weekend.
All hell could break loose.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Weekend Blues
So this weekend will be very long I think, even though I'll have a few things to do. I wish I could say that I was excited about it, but as it is I'm not. Do you ever just want to say inside and drink tea and watch old movies. I think I am having some kind of weekend anxiety; my insomnia is going to be off the charts I am sure.
Interestingly enough I have a few mildly fun things to do, but inevitably I will end up with the weekend blues. The only cure for that is a glass of wine and maybe long phone conversation with an old friend or two. I'd try shopping, but I can't stand long weekend line at the mall, or the crowds, or the loud screaming kids...you get the picture. I don't think that makes me old (actually I'm still quite young), it's that just makes me better suited for luxury resorts, with no kids, and excellent service, rather than a family fun festival. Hmm... wish I could just have an adventure, some romantic adventure, like Jane Eyre, minus the creepy boarding school and mad family relations (kind uncles excluded).
So it will be a tad bit dull this weekend, however I will endeavor to enjoy the quite nothing-to-do-ness now before I do have kids, and I don't get a moments peace till they go off to college. To all the parents out there....I commend you!
Weekend (and said glass of wine) I'll see you soon.
Interestingly enough I have a few mildly fun things to do, but inevitably I will end up with the weekend blues. The only cure for that is a glass of wine and maybe long phone conversation with an old friend or two. I'd try shopping, but I can't stand long weekend line at the mall, or the crowds, or the loud screaming kids...you get the picture. I don't think that makes me old (actually I'm still quite young), it's that just makes me better suited for luxury resorts, with no kids, and excellent service, rather than a family fun festival. Hmm... wish I could just have an adventure, some romantic adventure, like Jane Eyre, minus the creepy boarding school and mad family relations (kind uncles excluded).
So it will be a tad bit dull this weekend, however I will endeavor to enjoy the quite nothing-to-do-ness now before I do have kids, and I don't get a moments peace till they go off to college. To all the parents out there....I commend you!
Weekend (and said glass of wine) I'll see you soon.
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Possibilities and Dreams
Possibilities: Ok I very have exciting news....I may be getting a new job! (scream) It is in an industry I hope to stay in for the rest of my life. I can't wait to find out if I've gotten the position. I aim to learn and move up quickly and grow in my skills so that one day not too long from now I might open my own establishment and bring to the world my dream for them to enjoy!
I had been quite down about things until recently this new possibility came my way. It's sad that we sometimes have dreams and never pursue them. It's amazing when we do and the doors we thought would never be open to us, suddenly open and things start unfolding in amazing ways. Our dreams can become real. My dream can become real.
One day, again not too long from now, I'll wake up in the home I have always wanted, drive the car I have needed for a while now, and go open the doors to my own escape for others to come and enjoy. Dreamy.
Won't that be amazing? To wake up and all that you imagined has come to pass. I have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but what else is there to do? I've rested...a lot this past year due to injuries, and I have experienced what's it's like to be poor, and now there is new chapter opening up for me. I will embrace this change and endeavor to deserve all the blessings. I'm going to try to be happy.
I'm just so grateful for a positive change. Grateful for a new dream.
I had been quite down about things until recently this new possibility came my way. It's sad that we sometimes have dreams and never pursue them. It's amazing when we do and the doors we thought would never be open to us, suddenly open and things start unfolding in amazing ways. Our dreams can become real. My dream can become real.
One day, again not too long from now, I'll wake up in the home I have always wanted, drive the car I have needed for a while now, and go open the doors to my own escape for others to come and enjoy. Dreamy.
Won't that be amazing? To wake up and all that you imagined has come to pass. I have a lot of hard work ahead of me, but what else is there to do? I've rested...a lot this past year due to injuries, and I have experienced what's it's like to be poor, and now there is new chapter opening up for me. I will embrace this change and endeavor to deserve all the blessings. I'm going to try to be happy.
I'm just so grateful for a positive change. Grateful for a new dream.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Almost Fairy Hour
I often cannot sleep....insomnia is a terrible condition, especially when one has to get up early the next day. For me the best times to sleep are from mid-night to four in the morning, and then from eight to ten or so in the morning, after which I get up and I'm fine for the rest of the day. However I do plan on taking a siesta at four in the afternoon just to see if that helps me sleep through the night. Hey, it's worth a shot. I think when I was in college, I would sleep almost normal hours, but always rose up the next morning very tired and never really caught up till the weekend.
Now that I know what my sleep condition is and how best to deal with it, I find that I actually love the early morning hours. I used to hate them, dread them even; to wake up and know that you'll be up from four to eight in the morning no matter what you do is very annoying. But I've resigned myself to doing things during those hours that would not be possible otherwise.
For example: when it rains during the night, the best time to hear it is about 4:30am. All is quite, except for the rare car or two that might pass by. There are few or no planes, no trains, no buses, and no neighbors talking loudly, or kids laughing and/or screaming outside. I love these precious quiet times. I can think more clearly and pray more boldly. There are no distractions.
At one or two in the morning if I so happen to wake up then, I think those are the interesting times as well, for it is almost fairy hour, which is about three-ish. It's probably most quite at that hour because even insomniacs like me are still asleep. Mothers are up feeding their babies then, and the fairies, I think, must enjoy seeing that special bond take place.
Ok I don't really think fairies exists, at least not in the US, but it's nice to think about anyway.
So....I will continue enjoying the pale moon, and the stars, and when the hour of four comes around I'll see what other creative things I can invent or debate myself about, worry over, or pray about. Probably all three.
Sweet dreams.
Now that I know what my sleep condition is and how best to deal with it, I find that I actually love the early morning hours. I used to hate them, dread them even; to wake up and know that you'll be up from four to eight in the morning no matter what you do is very annoying. But I've resigned myself to doing things during those hours that would not be possible otherwise.
For example: when it rains during the night, the best time to hear it is about 4:30am. All is quite, except for the rare car or two that might pass by. There are few or no planes, no trains, no buses, and no neighbors talking loudly, or kids laughing and/or screaming outside. I love these precious quiet times. I can think more clearly and pray more boldly. There are no distractions.
At one or two in the morning if I so happen to wake up then, I think those are the interesting times as well, for it is almost fairy hour, which is about three-ish. It's probably most quite at that hour because even insomniacs like me are still asleep. Mothers are up feeding their babies then, and the fairies, I think, must enjoy seeing that special bond take place.
Ok I don't really think fairies exists, at least not in the US, but it's nice to think about anyway.
So....I will continue enjoying the pale moon, and the stars, and when the hour of four comes around I'll see what other creative things I can invent or debate myself about, worry over, or pray about. Probably all three.
Sweet dreams.
Saturday, March 26, 2011
I have issues....
Being over 25 does not insure ones ability to block out certain thoughts. I thought they would just turn off like a candle light snuffed out, but I am still thinking about what I am NOT supposed to be thinking about. This is still the hardest thing I've had to try and get out of my head since I learned that ice cream came in more than two flavors (vanilla and chocolate). Anyway....what to do???
I can let the thoughts persist, act on them, or I can deny them and see where that takes me. To let them persist would lead to nowhere but trouble. Sometimes I just want trouble to take me and I want to have fun with it. I have always played on the safe side and ...sometimes I'm just bored with that.
I guess that makes me ungrateful at times, but then again...I'm only human.
Back to these thoughts of, "what if", they usually come up when I'm not challenged or I am bored with the hum drum life I've slipped into. They are not lasting, but the fact that they still come up bothers me.
It bothers me, and there is no cure for it, at least not that I've found. I hate having such a vivid imagination too. I am really good at "imagining" what it would be like if....
ya know, "IF". So I guess I just need to let it ride and just go back to my normal life, create my own entertainment, and count my many blessings.
Yeah. I guess so.
I can let the thoughts persist, act on them, or I can deny them and see where that takes me. To let them persist would lead to nowhere but trouble. Sometimes I just want trouble to take me and I want to have fun with it. I have always played on the safe side and ...sometimes I'm just bored with that.
I guess that makes me ungrateful at times, but then again...I'm only human.
Back to these thoughts of, "what if", they usually come up when I'm not challenged or I am bored with the hum drum life I've slipped into. They are not lasting, but the fact that they still come up bothers me.
It bothers me, and there is no cure for it, at least not that I've found. I hate having such a vivid imagination too. I am really good at "imagining" what it would be like if....
ya know, "IF". So I guess I just need to let it ride and just go back to my normal life, create my own entertainment, and count my many blessings.
Yeah. I guess so.
Prototype Malfunction
(a little blurb)
The first time I saw the Matrix (yes that's right I did see that one), I thought to myself. "Wow...that makes so much sense about the lack of perfection in the world". Truth is I am not sure we humans could handle it. Perfection is such a large thing to explore, so I shall keep my writings on the matter somewhat brief. I believe in God and creation and the Bible. However I also think that there is a great many things that can be learned once you have accepted the fact that you are, infact, a prototype malfunction. I mean Adam and Eve messed it up for all of us to follow, and so God's perfect plan was no longer perfect in the sense that we humans would do everything perfectly. We humans make mistakes...A Lot of mistakes, but we also learn from them and grow and change and become better for it. I think I like being a prototype malfunction, as least that way I know I can improve myself. Best part is I will be in eternity, perfectly righteous unable to make any more mistakes (No more, "what happens in Vegas" mantras), and will occupy the future eons of my life learning and exploring and working and bettering myself amongst many many friends. That's all on that. P.S. I do long for another trip to Vegas though....such felicity of entertainment & shows.
The first time I saw the Matrix (yes that's right I did see that one), I thought to myself. "Wow...that makes so much sense about the lack of perfection in the world". Truth is I am not sure we humans could handle it. Perfection is such a large thing to explore, so I shall keep my writings on the matter somewhat brief. I believe in God and creation and the Bible. However I also think that there is a great many things that can be learned once you have accepted the fact that you are, infact, a prototype malfunction. I mean Adam and Eve messed it up for all of us to follow, and so God's perfect plan was no longer perfect in the sense that we humans would do everything perfectly. We humans make mistakes...A Lot of mistakes, but we also learn from them and grow and change and become better for it. I think I like being a prototype malfunction, as least that way I know I can improve myself. Best part is I will be in eternity, perfectly righteous unable to make any more mistakes (No more, "what happens in Vegas" mantras), and will occupy the future eons of my life learning and exploring and working and bettering myself amongst many many friends. That's all on that. P.S. I do long for another trip to Vegas though....such felicity of entertainment & shows.
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