Wine and Crush

Weeks continue to bring a new sense of hum drum, yet my career is taking off. I'd say it was a cruel irony except I'm ok with it. I like that work is going well, and literally moving at warp speed, while my home life is at a full stop. I do get bored when I'm not going going going at work, but then I get to let my mind wander off and consider....other possibilities. There in lies the real danger. Having too much time to think and get frustrated is never a good thing.

Really, seriously? I still can't figure out why "thinking" about another life is so bad. I suppose I should be content with the life I have and be grateful, but....well....I can't seem to help it. I want adventure, passion, romance....but all there is is wine and crush tonight.

I need to pray. 

Wondering...again

So I've been wondering again...(again), on the point a certain someone. Seems the thought is not as shocking as it once was. Matter of fact I can hardly remember a time when it wasn't, at the very least, shocking! I mean, imagine knowing a person, not even really wanting to hold the person's name in your mind longer than a second for fear of constant irritation the whole rest of the day. Imagine then that that thought turns to intrigue, and then to wonder, and then...something all together different than irritation. Now that is shocking to me! Like the first sip of strong black coffee; first your nose turns up at it, then suddenly your addicted. What can you do for that kind of addiction? Especially when you're not even sure if that addiction is mutual. Nothing much you can do, I suppose, except wonder....and wait.
That's it. There is no happy ending without action, and there will be none on my part. For women were made to be wooed, and not to woo.
Really though...this is just some silliness. Nothing serious at all.

So What Else Is New....

So What Else Is New.....??  It's Summer, and Summer means that you will get, if you haven't already, that perpetual itch to go somewhere exciting (preferably topical). With all the deals out there these days, due in part to the last attempt at getting us to spend money we don't really have, it's hard to say, "no".  Living Social, Groupon, BookingBuddy...they all make it so easy don't they?! But the real question is who are you going to go with? I mean money is easier to spend, at least I think so, when you know you are going to blow your savings on a great time with someone you really like, perhaps even love and adore.

This Summer seemed to come out of nowhere, and know I find myself scrambling to plan an exciting, yet not too extravagant, vacation for myself and my honey. Taking advantage of all the deals out there and joyfully tossing my credit card number at them, seems perfectly rational because I know that what I am really doing is investing in memories. You can't really put a price on the laughs you'll share with your loved one can you? No!

So back to the question..."what else is new"? Well not much really; work, home, and family are all very much the same. However I feel like there is one special thing that is very welcomed and new, and it is the wild excitement, anticipation, and hope of creating some wonderful amazing memories this Summer!

I hope you will do the same. Have fun!!!

The Evil Plot Twist...

So in every movie, book, etc....well good ones at least, there is evil plot twist. Something has to go wrong. It's inevitable. Whether it's a love triangle, the team is failing, or the hero gets a set back....the rise to a joyful ending can't happen without first having the leading character/s go through some drama.

My favorite is and will always be the love triangle. Why? Because watching people become idiots over love is just plain amusing. I want the hero to win, and the underdog to come out on top in the last seconds of the game, but what can be more exhilarating than a guy or gal losing it for love. I mean people do some crazy, crazy things when they are smitten. They stop eating, or eat too, they stop doing their jobs well, or on time (gee don't want to have any surgeries from a heartbroken surgeon). People will risk it all when love goes awry. They fear it will pass them by and they'll end up alone.  That's the real issue isn't it? Being alone. It isn't so bad when you have the dream of love still being out there for you, but what if it's not.

You go to school, work really hard, get the perfect job, work that job for years and years till you're right where you want to be and then suddenly....a bomb goes off in your head and you start to think, "Hey, I don't want to be alone forever." You start dating just because you have this perfect time-line in your mind, you know... now that everything else has fallen into place. What you fail to realize is that love is the great crux! It is that arrow to the heart of all you hold dear, your job, your waist line,.. your sanity. Finally finding love means you'll most likely have to make certain compromises in other areas of your life. The best part is...that if the love is real and the intoxication is lasting, you won't care at all. You won't care if you lose all you worked so hard to acquire (well maybe not the waistline). And you will have gained the best thing you've ever known, or will ever experience again.

Enjoy the crazy ride called love. It is worth it!

Phoenix

Phoenix

The love or crazy idea of it,
only time I've had some fun
since it's begun, I'm undone
can't let you go

You've got secrets, I'll keep them,
won't tell a soul, pretend I don't know
whisper and I'll hear you
say nothing and I will fall

I hate this, and it's nothing
with me it's all or over
I'm undone. Can't figure it out.
With pressing words unsaid, I'm surrounded
I hate this. Hate that I miss you at all.

I wanted to be over it
the loneliness I feel keeps growing
It draws me your way,
Sometimes I wonder why

Stay mean, stay cold,
Stay the way you were always
I don't need you, just the crazy thought
I can live on that, till another

I hate this, and it's nothing
with me it's all or over
I'm undone. Can't figure it out.
With pressing words unsaid, I'm surrounded
I hate this. Hate that I miss you at all.

Don't be safe, please don't be sane
Can't stand the thought of you in a box
I've always lived there, it's not easy
Makes me bend your way

Don't ask what I wanted, I was stupid
I kept it simple, kept it calm
Safe is just a cage I've built myself
The doors wide open now

I hate this, and it's nothing
with me it's all or over
I'm undone. Can't figure it out.
With pressing words unsaid, I'm surrounded
I hate this. Hate that I miss you at all.

Just tell me, I'll follow
I'm ok now, just need a way out
I'm not the girl I used to be
a tidal wave, at the limit
a phoenix, can't you see now

Stay the same, don't change
dangerous, tender, and unmoved
I'll hate to leave you, never to pursue
loneliness is not the end
You have me

I hate this, and it's nothing
with me it's all or over
I'm undone. Can't figure it out.
With pressing words unsaid, I'm surrounded
I hate this. Hate that I miss you at all.

Back on Track....sort of

So this week was kind of whirl wind for me. Acupuncture drama Tuesday. Hair drama Wednesday. Headache Thursday. But then good news on Thursday did me some good. Found out a friend was coming to town. Someone I had wanted to see for a while.
Back to bad news....I had to work all weekend. Errggg...! Good news is I still got to spend some time with my friend and have some much needed fun.

I actually have been a bit silly and bit crazy over it. Nothing out of the blue for me.

Looking forward to more good times soon.

Two Days Of Trouble

So this past weekend was my anniversary....a very scary thing let me tell you. I went into thinking please don't let me give myself away by expressing my actual thoughts about the relationship out loud...(a little champagne can make me let my guard down). So that being said, I had certain reservations about doing anything too quite (like sitting around at home watching movies), or too social (like getting together with certain someone who makes me get all silly and giddy). It was just better to stay out and about and away from people 'he', or 'I', or 'we' know. Needless to say it worked out. I thought for sure it would be two days of trouble, but instead, I had a very nice weekend, bordering on 'the-way-things-used-to be' and I can honestly say that I wish I had a few more days like it.

Who wouldn't like early lunch, followed by new hot movie, and toped off with some Boston Legal or Jane Austen? Anyway....we'll see what happens next weekend.

All hell could break loose.